Marijuana edibles + served in cafeteria

Edibles like these cereal bars will be served in the cafeteria starting April 10th. (Eggrole/CC by 20)

Edibles like these cereal bars will be served in the cafeteria starting April 10th. (Eggrole/CC by 20)

Get ready to be even more blazed than usual for your Wednesday night History of Cinema class. The Saddleback College cafeteria has partnered with EdiPure and Bhang to bring a plethora of edible marijuana choices to demanding students.

Now it will be that much easier to keep your pre-class smoke sesh high going with edibles like EdiPure Rainbow Belts, Bhang Bars and Cornucopia Karmel Korn. The amount of options available is staggering, even marijuana infused beverages will be available instead of soda. School health officials responded to this change by stating “Marijuana is an herb, and that’s natural. What’s natural about soda?”.

This sort of drug infusion into beverages is not a new phenomena. Coca Cola famously placed trace amounts of cocaine into their product until 1929. Sprig, a weed infused soda, is slated to replace the soda fountain by the end of April.

Some of the other products being introduced to students include Pot-o-Coffee brand Tea, Coffee and Cocoa are designed to not only bring down stress levels in students, but to increase engagement in classroom discussions.

Too many students remain silent whenever an instructor asks the class a question. According to studies student interaction goes up 75 percent when the student in question is high on the marijuana.

“We just need to get kids smoking more J’s and maybe we can stop posting these ‘Be Social’ signs all over campus,” said a psychology instructor who requested to be anonymous.

Saddleback students have mixed opinions on the new edible policy.

“Wait do people still get high? I thought everyone vaped,” said David Reza, graphic design major

Some of these opinions are based on experience. Chris Jenkins, horticulture major, says that edibles would have a negative effect on students.

“The one time I took an edible I sat in the corner and didn’t say anything at all, so I don’t think that edibles will positively affect all students,” Jenkins said.

However, not everyone is down on edibles however.

“I personally talked to God on an edible high so I feel like edibles would expand the communication skills of students,” said Marc Benny, business major.

Christy Claud, a fashion major, is incredibly excited for the new policy.

“I usually pack my vape with bud before class, but since we can’t vape on campus anymore I’ve had to resort to hotboxing my car,” Claud said. “Edibles in the cafeteria will really be a huge convenience to me in my everyday life”.

How much this will impact education at Saddleback is yet to be seen, but many are anxiously awaiting the outcomes of the new edible policy. Whether student interaction goes up or down will be proven within the next coming weeks. Needless to say, students will be stoned at Saddleback.