HOROSCOPES: Your guide to what’s up this month in astrology
Expect Jupiter to create a sextile with Pluto, Chiron to enter Aries, Saturn and Pluto to retrograde and Venus to enter Gemini for an exciting turn of events in April.
ARIES: Relationships can be important this month, Aries. It’s definitely not the time to be passive aggressive at work or impulsive and sleep with the person in whom your best friend has developed an interest. Involving yourself in a generous gesture this month will definitely improve your tendency to be a moody little butt. Mercury ends its retrograde in your sign on April 15. Use that time to be a little introspective to question why you might be too short-tempered or self-involved at times.
TAURUS: Make sure to recharge your spiritual batteries this month, Taurus. We both know that comfort and pleasure, or more or less finding an excuse to be lazy, can be one of your strong suits. Take time to sit down and ponder about your health, dear Taurus. Can you drink more kombucha? Can you improve and live your best life? After the new moon on April 15, consider going to a kegger and not being as responsible as usual. It’s your birthday month, anyways.
GEMINI: Oh boy, Gemini. Every meme about astrology on the internet includes you. I would not call you two-faced in your nature. No, your personality just includes being emotionally unstable. Sure, make an excuse about how a perfect human does not exist. Consider thinking about your values this month, Gemini. The Lunar Eclipse on April 24 will express your need to be adventurous. An unplanned trip to a location 3,000 miles away might hit the spot. Who needs to plan anything anyways?
CANCER: Consider the term “transparency” this whole month, Cancer. Your personal upbringing taught you to be the type to not reveal too much about your personal life. Contemplate on going to a bar and telling a stranger your whole life story. Not only will this be emotionally rewarding, but it could be helpful. The lunar eclipse this month might bring a new potential romance centerstage. Stop being so challenging, potential partners might not be turned on by your Rubik’s cube of emotions. However, remember to be yourself, to some degree.
LEO: You love being the center of attention, dear Leo. Carly Simon definitely sang about a Leo in her song “You’re So Vain,” because that describes you in a nutshell. Karma can be quite the female dog this month. The solar eclipse on April 8 will bring with it a challenging period. Consider burning all your bridges this month. That will definitely light your way into the spotlight.
VIRGO: This month will test your inability to commit to anything whatsoever, lovely Virgo. The stars describe you as the type of person to see an individual of interest at a show and direct message them later telling them that you saw them at said show. Stop playing games. The solar eclipse on April 8 will bring positive financial arrangements. Consider leasing an apartment with a potential romance. Nothing says commitment more than signing a one year lease with another person.
LIBRA: No one can carry a grudge as long as you can, Libra. One of your favorite past times includes seeing how long you can give to the silent treatment to a person with whom you have simple differences. The concept of romantic relationships becomes a focus for you this month. However, consider that potential interests might not want to deal with someone that carries themselves with the emotional behavior of a four-year-old. The lunar eclipse on April 24 brings potential financial gain. This month creates the perfect time to impulsive buy that $638 Supreme cheetah print jacket.
SCORPIO: Being jealous of those around you cannot be good for you, feisty Scorpio. Being health conscious will guide your month. The first step towards acknowledging your health involves shopping at Whole Foods. Consider opening a Chase Amazon Prime credit card. Not only will you gain 5 percent back of your purchases, but you will also be able to boost your credit score. Win-Win pal. The lunar eclipse on April 25 will make you more work-oriented. Contemplate doing something nice for your co-workers, like baking homemade phallic-shaped cookies.
SAGITTARIUS: Your nature revolves around being entirely reckless, honest Sagittarius. Nothing screams you more than getting involved in a sticky situation that questions your honest and generous tendencies. Or your self-respect. The lunar eclipse on April 25 will bring your clairvoyant abilities to light. Consider yourself a less powerful version of X-Men’s Jean Grey this month. Also, maybe take a step back from drinking every single night. Your liver will thank you later.
CAPRICORN: For such a serious and responsible person, you sure can be quite the sensitive crybaby, Capricorn. Outsiders see you as emotionless, but the truth could not be further from that flash judgement. Consider being less reactive to everything you hear this month, as well as developing your own opinions. With Venus in your house of romance on April 12, the possibility of hearing from someone in your past might happen. Stop being walked on like a doormat and ignore that person from your past into oblivion.
AQUARIUS: A true introvert at heart, your sarcastic nature seeps through the seams of your personality, Aquarius. An Aquarius is the metaphorical embodiment of a child throwing a temper tantrum at a store over not getting what they want. Hell incarnate involves an angry Aquarius. Ditch the attitude this month, it cannot be doing you any favors afterall. The solar eclipse on April 8 creates an involvement with your neighborhood. Consider joining the neighborhood watch to target the least favorite member of your community.
PISCES: Daydreaming is an embodiment of you, Pisces. You can be quite the sad, mental escapist at heart. Ponder whether these characteristics involve overcompensation for the boring oblivion you have created for yourself. Call upon your creative endeavors. The lunar eclipse on April 24 will intensify your writing, teaching and traveling abilities. Consider turning those recurrent dreams into reality (for once) with your new powers this month.
